7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE FATHERS

Here are 7 Habits that help fathers be the best dads they can be:

1. EFFECTIVE FATHERS ARE PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY PRESENT

Many fathers make the mistake of thinking that their primary role is to provide for the family material needs. Although fathers do have a huge responsibility in this regard, fathers have a bigger responsibility to tend to their children’s emotional needs. There is no amount of toys or video games, friends or babysitters that can replace the father- shaped-void in a child’s heart.

2. EFFECTIVE FATHERS KNOW AND SPEAK THEIR CHILDREN LOVE LANGUAGE

Each of our children has their own unique way of registering that we love them. One of your kids may love to cuddle, while another prefers a hug and a kiss. Find out what works out for your child and find ways to show your love including spending one on one time with them.

3. EFFECTIVE FATHERS DISCIPLINE THEIR CHILDREN

We live in a world where “discipline” often gets a bad rap, because many equate it with physical and emotional abuse. To discipline your child means you being intentional in training, and instructing them in the context of everyday life.

4. EFFECTIVE FATHERS INSTILL HEALTHY FAMILY RYTHMS

We live in a high paced day and age, where the ever increasing demands of life have the ability of draining and destroying any notion of family life. Work deadlines, business trips, birthday parties, countless extracurricular activities and piles of homework all have the tendency of keeping us “busy” “doing” and hardly ever to “simply be”. Enter the effective father. It is the father’s responsibility to lead his family; and part of leading them is to set the pace and create those spaces where the family can truly enjoy the things that really matter. For example daily communal meal times, monthly outings, yearly holiday etc. children need structure and a father can strengthen the family as a whole by instilling these rhythms and structures.

5. EFFECTIVE FATHERS KNOW HOW TO SAY NO

Effective fathers know how to say no. Unlike in the past where children were to” to be seen not heard”, we now live in a day and age where children have become center of their own universes. Everything evolves around them and parents are doing everything in their power to keep them comfortable and happy. The effective father is wise enough not to play this game. He grasps that the loving thing to do is to help his children grasp that “they can’t always get what they want. This lesson can be taught daily in a host of ways including not giving in every time the child is throwing a tantrum, not allowing a toddler to grab a toy from his sibling or even not allowing the child to interrupt adult conversation.

6. EFFECTIVE FATHERS KNOW WHEN TO SAY SORRY

The” effective father” is not the perfect father. There are many times they mess up. They get home tired and stressed and sometimes the kids are on the receiving end of their frustration. A father can lose his cool over minor incidents and fail to keep his promises. When the kids  ask to play, often he finds himself saying  “no not now I’m busy”. The effective father is however man enough to own his mistakes, weakness and short comings. He is humble enough to ask his children for forgiveness as he seeks to be a better father.

7. EFFECTIVE FATHERS KEEP THEIR MARRIAGES STRONG

It might sound like cliché, but there is no greater gift a father can give his children than to keep working on his marriage. Children are way more perceptive than we would like to acknowledge and they are masters at sensing when there is tension between the parents. Experienced school teachers will tell you that by merely looking at the work, demeanor and behavior of their pupils, they can make an educated guess as to how things are going at home between mum and dad.There is a strong correlation between a healthy marriage and a healthy child.

Indeed. There is no man so wealthy as the man who has that which money can’t buy – namely happy, contented, well-grounded children.